Emes Ve-Emunah

Samantha Geimer - Sexually abused as a minor

It is pretty clear that any adult that has sex with a 13 year old, is guilty of sexual abuse. I don’t think there is anyone alive that would dispute that. One might ask, what if there was consent? That question is absurd. A 13 year old is not mature enough to give her consent.

This is not news. Nor has it been as far back as I can remember. The effect on a 13 year old girl that had a sexual encounter with an adult male must be devastating. There is not a mental health worker alive that doesn’t know that. I can only imagine the toll it must take on therapists that deal with these survivors. It must be gut wrenching to listening to survivors speak about the emotional pain they suffer because of it. As it must be for the families of those survivors.

And yet one of the most famous directors in the world, who committed exactly this crime 4 decades ago, is treated like a hero. Hollywood has honored this man with an Academy Award as best director for the movie, The Pianist. Which is one of the better Holocaust movies. A movie that held much meaning for this director since he is a survivor of the Holocaust.

He received this award in 2005 by an academy that was fully aware of his abuse - and the survivor he created. He was not in Hollywood the night he received it because he had - and still has - a warrant out for his arrest. Should he ever set foot into this country, he will be arrested.

For those who don’t know who I am talking about, the abuser was Roman Polanski. From MSN News:

Samantha Geimer went to Jack Nicholson’s house in the Hollywood Hills in 1977, believing she would take part in a photoshoot. Instead Polanski, it was alleged, gave her a sedative washed down with champagne, and raped her.

In 1977 Polanski was convicted of statutory rape; spent a little over a month in jail and released. This was probably as result of a plea bargain. When he learned that the judge changed his mind about the plea bargain - he fled the country and returned to his home in Poland.That’s where things stand now.

Polanski is a super achiever. His repertoire of films is very impressive. As are the number of awards has gotten for his work – including many Academy Award nominations. He he is also a victim. Not only as a survivor of the Holocaust but as a survivor of the horrific murder of his wife, Sharon Tate by the members of the ‘Manson family’.

How should we in the world of observant Judaism see all of this? First let us review what we know. Most experts on sexual abuse will tell you that abusers are sometimes very prominent people. Like Polanski they are sometimes super achievers. Beloved by the people in the community they serve. They may be otherwise exemplary citizens that contribute much to their communities.

That’s why there has been resistance by the rabbis of organizations like Agudah to report abuse directly to the police. They want to protect the reputations of people that - until they were accused - were among the ‘best of the best’ of their community. In many cases they were married with loving families. No one had ever suspected them of abuse. Nor was there ever a hint of it in their behavior. Believing the worst about them was understandably unthinkable.

This led to an erroneous conclusion of suspecting the victims of lying. Why would they lie? These rabbis might say that perhaps there was some sort of vendetta against the accused. Who should they believe? A youngster with no reputation? Or the accused ‘hero’ with no record who denies it?

Logic (to them) dictated that they believe the accused. They simply want to spare him and his family the embarrassment of having been publicly accused of something so uncharacteristic of a person that gives so much of himself to the community.

The problem as we all too well know by now as that accusations of abuse by young people are rarely false. Furthermore serial abusers will often go out of their way to be generous to their community in order to inoculate themselves from accusations of abuse.

Bearing this in mind - it puts into question the reaction these rabbis have. One would hope that they take these facts into consideration. But old habits die hard. So while they agree a witness to an actual abuse should go directly to the police - they still insist on personally approving suspicions of it before they are reported to them. Without their authorization to do so, they forbid it. Leaving the victim out in the cold.

Victims then become traumatized survivors who like some Holocaust survivors can suffer a lifetime with the thoughts about what they survived. And in the case of abuse - how they were treated when they reported it. They often suffer bouts of depression and thoughts of suicide.

That attitude has given the Agudah a ‘black eye’ in the mind of many survivors and their advocates.

I wonder though how they feel about Roman Polanski and the community that honors him - knowing that he has sex with a 13 year old girl, was convicted of stautory rape; and escaped punishment by fleeing the country? They not only seem to ignore it – but have thrust many honors upon him!

And yet when a a convicted sex offender is honored by the Torah world there is endless condemnation of it. (As there should be in my view). Shouldn’t the entertainment industry get the same treatment Agudah gets? Where is the outrage there? I understand that rabbis should have a higher ethical standard than Hollywood. But still, I have never heard a world of criticism about Polanski. Not when he won the Academy Award. Or since. Only praise. Is there a double standard?

And what if a victim of abuse was not all that traumatized by it? Is that even possible? Are people who make that claim lying? Why would they lie about that?

These are questions I asked myself when Polanski’s victim made the following claim:

"It wasn't as traumatic for me as everyone would like to believe it was. I was a young, sexually active teenager and it was scary thing. But it was not an uncommon thing. Much worse things happen to people," she said.

The victim said that at a news conference and asked that the charges against him be dropped. Does any of this make a difference? I have to wonder, how does the survivor community, their advocates, and mental health professionals feel about it?

Satmar anti Israel Rally yesterday at Barclay's

Whenever I criticize Satmar, I am immediately pointed to their Bikur Choilm Society. This Chesed group is renowned for serving the sick among Israel. There is no doubt about that. They visit the sick in ways that few others do. Among the many things they do is provide hot meals not only for the sick, but for any relatives staying with them in hospitals.

Satmar Bikur Choim volunteers do not ask which denomination a patient or his family members belong to. Or even ask how religious they are. It does not matter to them. They see a Jew in need and they help them. All I can say about that is that Hamas is known for doing Chesed for their coreligionists too.

Now before anyone jumps all over me for comparing Satmar to Hamas, I’m not. Obviously Hamas is a murderous terrorist organization that kills innocent people indiscriminately for their cause. Satmar does not do anything near that. I make the comparison in order to point out that doing something right does not absolve anyone from doing something wrong .

The wrong Satmar does to the Jewish people is their absolute unremitting hatred and bashing of Israel. They stop at nothing to get that message out.

Now they will strongly protest that charge as did Rabbi David Niederman, one of Satmar’s leaders. He was quoted saying the following in the Jerusalem Post:

“We are not anti-Israel,” “We pray three times a day and we are yearning for the time that we are going to come back to Israel…”

That is at best disingenuous. Loving the land is not the same as loving the state. Satmar is known to oppose Jewish sovereignty over the land until such time as Moshaich comes. Our presence there as a sovereign nation is a violation of God’s dictates -as per the Satmar Rebbe’s interpretation and application of a Gemarah in our day. Even if Israel was fully governed by Charedim, they would still be opposed to its existence as a state.

Yesterday this animus was once again made clear:

Close to 20,000 Orthodox Jews gathered on Sunday at the Barclays Center basketball arena in Brooklyn to protest the Israeli law mandating Orthodox conscription into the IDF, which they described as “Israel’s persecution of religious Jews”.

Rabbi Niederman call this a violation of religious freedom and considers Israel’s conscription law to be a violation of the agreement made with the Charedi world at the founding of the state. Which was to exempt Yeshiva students from the military.

What he does not tell you is that Yeshiva students are not conscripted. They are still exempt as long as they are in the Yeshiva. What has changed is that they must now all register with a draft board. Much the same way I did in the US when I was in the Yeshiva in the late 60s and early 70s. At that time all able bodied men were subject to the draft and serving in the military. Yeshiva students like me were exempt. But we still had to register under penalty of law if we didn’t.

Now I have no issue with exempting members of the clergy or students studying for it from the military. My objection only begins when every able bodied male of an entire community becomes a yeshiva student – thus exempting everyone in it. This was not the case when the agreement was made. There were a few hundred Yeshiva students at the time. Now there are tens of thousands!

Be that as it may, The Israeli government has seen fit to honor its former commitment and not draft sitting Yeshiva students into the army. However, they must still register.

The more moderate factions of the Charedi world have agreed and told heir students to register. But Peleg, the extremist wing of Charedim under the leadership of Rav Shmuel Auerbach will not hear of it. Rav Auerbach has told his followers to disobey the law and not register at all. That has spurred many violent incidents in that cause. The latest of which is the following as reported in the Jerusalem Post:

40-year-old Moshe Iraam, a Jerusalem resident, traveled on May 5 to Moshav Kfar Tavor in the Lower Galilee, where Almoz lives, and accosted him outside the synagogue after the Friday night prayer service…

Later in May, several dozen haredi extremists descended on Almoz’s private residence and protested against the enlistment of haredi men, although the indictment did not mention Iraam in connection with these events.

The demonstrators distributed flyers that read: “Moti Almoz, head of the Manpower Directorate, who sells his soul for money: How long will you burn the souls of the sons and daughters of Israel in the crematorium of Auschwitz – the army of destruction… your end will be bitter, like Hitler’s and his friends.”

While Satmar has not - to the best of my knowledge - used the same kind of hyperbole they surely agree with those sentiments. How can they not? The original Satmar Rebbe, R’ Yoel Teitelbaum, subtly characterized Religious Zionism’s spiritual father, Rav Avrohom Yitzchok HaKoehn Kook, as a virtual ‘Hitler’! (He did this in writing using the description in Megilas Esther for Haman, the ‘Hitler’ of his time!)

This rally is just more of the same.

The arguments put forth by Rabbi Neiderman defending this rally do not hold water. Even if you agree with him about Israel not needing Charedim to fulfill the IDF manpower needs, As I said, Israel isn’t drafting Charedim now. They are only asking them to register and exempting them as long as they stay in a Yeshiva or a Kollel!

Nor is it legitimate for him to claim that Israel’s whole purpose for the draft is to change the character of the Charedi Jew. This is evidenced by the advent of Charedi units. And by the fact that Charedim have been given the option of doing community service as a fulfillment of the military obligation.

Let us be honest. This is yet another opportunity for Satmar to bash the State of Israel.

Why is this acceptable to the more moderate Charedi leadership of the type associated with Agudah? They know that the Charedi world in Israel has achieved unprecedented success in Torah study.

As noted there are tens of thousands of men studying Torah full time without any interference. They are very aware that the Israeli government helps support them financially in a variety of ways. They realize that Israel has provided the infrastructure that enables all its citizens - including Charedim - to live in the relative comfort of a civilized world. They are quite aware that the IDF helps protects them from being annihilated by Israel’s enemies.

I don’t understand why the more moderate segments of the American Charedi leadership does not condemn This event and Satmar for organizing it.

Why do they only reserve their condemnation for the left? Is there no one on the right that ever deserves condemnation? How can they look the other way when 20,000 people show up at a rally to protest something that isn’t even happening the way they say it is? …to protest a nation that has given Torah study such a favorable home? Is this not a Chilul HaShen? Doesn’t their silence have the appearance of agreement?

Why can’t the moderate American Charedi leadership follow the lead of the moderate Charedi leadership in Israel? Let them condemn Satmar - the same way their moderate counterparts in Israel have condemned Peleg!

I have heard their response to this kid of question in the past. And it disturbs me. They will say something like, ‘There is enough division in Klal Yisroel.’ ‘We will therefore not publicly criticize them since their anti State position is a valid one – even though we disagree with it.’

Really? Is this the kind of unity they seek? Why? Because Satmar Chasidim look so Frum?!

The time has come for the more moderate American Charedi leadership of the type that is associated with Agudah to speak up . Peleg and Satmar are one on this issue. And they deserve the same treatment. Agudah fears creating yet another rift? I say let it happen. As long as they continue to publicly hate and disparage Israel, I can think of no better group to separate ourselves from than Satmar.

I remember Norman and Bernie Eisenstein. These identical twin brothers were students at HTC back when I was a student there in the late 60s and early 70s. One of the things that stood out about these two brothers is how stridently anti establishment they were. They were zealots in expressing their negative views about the institution they were attending.

While many fellow students agreed with them about some of the negative things that we perceived back then, they were among the most strident and vocal in their criticism.

It is true that students have every right – and perhaps even an obligation to protest wrongdoing by the institution they attend. Back then the big complaint was about the yeshiva policy of allowing its ordainees to accept non Mechitza pulpits. Most of us felt it was wrong and we said so. But there was something about the Eisenstein brothers that made their stridency stand out. I remember not feeling very comfortable around them.

Truth is that I did not have much to do with them during our time in the Yeshiva together. They left long before I did. And I had no clue what happened to them after that. I later heard that unfortunately, Bernie passed away.

I was made aware of Norman during the controversy surrounding Rabbi Natan Slifkin. Norman was now known as Nachum. And Rabbi Nachum Eisenstein has made quite a name for himself. Mostly as part of R’ Elyashiv’s inner circle and as his right hand man.

It was Rabbi Nachum Eisenstein that was one of the main conduits for the elderly Rav Elayahiv on matters outside of his immediate environment. Which surely affected the way Rav Elyashiv reacted them. It is not too hard to imagine the kind of spin given to Rav Elyashiv by someone like Rabbi Eisenstein. Which caused him to make the kind of pronouncements he did.

I can’t say for sure – I wasn’t there – but it’s quite possible that Rabbi Slifkin’s books would not have been banned by Rav Elyashiv had Rabbi Eisenstein not been the one to inform him about them.

Rabbi Eisenstein gets a lot of respect now. I have to wonder though whether that respect isn’t based mostly on his relationship with R’ Elayshiv. There is a phenomenon known as ‘guilt by association’. This usually refers to a negative opinion about someone based on who he ‘hangs out with’. That is a poor way to judge someone though. The great sage R’ Meir used to hang with Elisha Ben Avuyah, a former sage after went bad. In spte of that relationship, R’ Meir didn't turn out to bad.

I think the same phenomenon can be applied to respect. Is Rabbi Eisenstein respected because of his association with R’ Elyashiv? I think that might have something to do with it. Does hanging out with great people make someone great? Not in my book.

I for one do not have all that much respect for Rabbi Eisenstein’s views. I remember how he was as a student at HTC. I doubt he has changed his personality much since them. He seemed to revel in controversy then. And he seems to revel in it now.

His latest comments were heard during a radio interview with Dovid Lichetnstien some of which can be seen on Rabbi Slifkin’s blog, Rationalist Judaism: Here is some of the conversation quoted by Rabbi Slifkin:

Lichtenstein begins by asking Rav Eisenstein if there is a chillul Hashem in the number of charedim who live off government welfare. Rav Eisenstein emphatically denies that there is any chillul Hashem. He explains that the government has a responsibility to its citizens to enable them to live at a certain standard... There is no problem to choose not to work and to live off benefits.

The interviewer asks in surprise, "Is the Gemara's statement that a father has an obligation to teach his son a trade not relevant?" Definitely not, replies Rav Eisenstein, the Gemara is talking about a minor... if a father sends his kid to a school where he can learn the basics, to read and write, that's a trade... all those things you get from grade school. Many people got a higher education and still can't feed their large families of ten children. So getting an education is not the solution…

Well then, asks the interviewer, what is the solution?

The solution, replies Rav Eisenstein, is the one given by Rav Chaim Kanievsky. The solution is not to talk about it. Countless families in Israel marry off their children and provide homes for them. It's a miracle, and once you start dissecting it, it won't happen anymore...

Rav Eisenstein further explains that the problem isn't even that big to begin with. Hardly anyone in the charedi community needs to collect charity door-to-door, he claims. Most people get by, thanks to the miracle.

If the poverty situation in Israel among Charedim wasn’t so dire, this world be funny.

Relying on miracles?! That is his answer?! And hardly anyone needs to collect charity door to door? Really? This is the measure he uses about he financial well being of his community?!

Does he not realize how so many Avrechim manage to support their usually very large families? Has he not heard about the numerous Gemachs (free loan societies) established just to insure that at least those families will not starve? Is he not aware how many Avrecihim borrow from one Gemach to pay back a loan from another?

Does he not know that many of them max out their credit cards? And then pay off the miminum balances each month – thus increasing the debt and the massive interest payments they must make every month? Does he not realize how often parents of these Avreichim help them out finaincially – often doing things like second mortgaging their homes, or selling life insurance policies, or working well past retirement age – just so they can help their children in a Kollel in Israel survive?

Sure, they don’t go door to door. Yet. But what happens when they finally do leave Kollel with absolutely no training for the workplace? What happens to those that in far too many cases are unable to catch up with their educated counterparts in the work force that were properly educated?

Although there are a variety of programs designed to train Charedim that have left Kollel for the workplace – helping them catch up. Not everyone is capable doing it. Those people are left out in the cold with low paying jobs – unable to pay their bills? There are probably more than a few people like that. Is Rabbi Eisenstein so sure that none of them ever end up going door to door to collect charity for their situations?

I think he actually does know all of this. Rabbi Eisenstein is not stupid. But he is partisan. And if the official line of the Charedi world is that young people do not need an education, by golly he’s going to be the one to trumpet that the loudest. Once a Kanoi, always a Kanoi.

None of this surprises me. That’s how he was as a student back in HTC. When evaluating anyone’s public comments, it helps to know where they are coming from. That is certainly no less true here.

Professor Gerald Schroeder - Author of Genesis and the Big Bang

One of the greatest teachers I ever had was Dr. Solar. (I wish I could remember his first name). He was my zoology professor at Roosevelt University back in the late 60s. Dr. Solar was a respected member of the scientific community. (He had worked in a scientific team on the discovery of DNA if I recall correctly). He is also an Orthodox Jew. And yet he was the person that opened up my eyes to the Theory of Evolution.

Our class which took place in the evening consisted of many Orthodox Jewish students some of whom (like me) were Yeshiva students. After one of those lectures on evolution a few of us ran up to him and asked if he personally believed in it. His answer was an unequivocal yes. We were all somewhat surprised at that responded since we all knew he was a religious Orthodox Jew. But he clearly told us that believing in Evolution does not contradict the Torah. Which of course has a different narrative about the origin of species. The two were compatible in the sense that the Torah does not tell us the mechanism God used to create the species. So that evidence of evolution can simply mean that this was the method God used.

I am not going to get into the some details of this discussion other than to say that I do not believe that evidence of evolution contradicts the Torah. I don’t think there is any question that evolution takes place. This can be demonstrated in microcosm in any high school science lab. Which had been done by my daughter many times when she taught science at Hanna Sacks Beis Yaakov. Whether Evolution is the origin of species or not - is beyond the scope of this post.

I bring this up in the context of whether scientists generally believe in God. My impression is that most of them don’t. I got this impression form a few very prominent scientists that do not keep these vies secret.

I recall a wonderful PBS series in the 80s called ‘Cosmos’. Therein the late astrophysicist Carl Sagan described the wonderful world of the stars and dealt with things like Einstein’s Special Theory of Relativity. Truly fascinating stuff. He explained everything on all of those episodes in easy to understand language. But I recall one particular episode where he actually made the argument not to believe in God. He was convinced that God does not exist.

A few years ago Fox had an updated version of Cosmos where another astrophysicist by the name of Neil deGrasse Tyson did the same thing, arguing that the scientific way of seeing things is the basis of all truth. And that we should all give up our preconceived notions about a Creator for which there is no proof.

The late evolutionary biologist, Stephen J. Gould was an atheist too.

Albert Einstein was an atheist as well. His comment about ‘God not playing dice with the universe’ was just a euphemism used to dismiss the quantum theory of the Niels Bohr and the Uncertainty Principle.

And finally there is theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking. Whom many consider the greatest living scientist of our day - on par with Albert Einstein. He is an avowed atheist. (The movie about his life – The Theory of Everything made that very clear.)

Why is it that so many scientists do not believe in God?

I have a theory of my own about that. It depends on just how much one relies on the 5 physical senses. If that is the only measure one uses to determine reality, then the scientific inability to physically detect God’s existence leads the scientific mind to assume the null hypothesis. Which assumes nullity unless proven otherwise. Since God cannot be conclusively proven, why bother believing in Him, they ask.

This approach fosters a mindset that tends to doubt the existence of a spiritual world. Of which God is obviously part. They will assert that using religion to explain existence was for an era where many phenomena could not be explained in scientific terms. Now much of that phenomena can be explained. We don’t need any kind of Spiritual Being to explain anything.

Where does that leave us, the believing Jew that also believes in science? Is there a such a thing as a scientist that believes in God?

Well, yes, as in the above-mentioned Dr. Solar. And among the more famous ones there is Professor Gerald Schroeder and the late physicist, Arye Kaplan. There is in fact an entire organization of scientists that believe not only in God, but in the Torah. It’s called the Association of Orthodox Jewish Scientists.

The point is that there is nothing incompatible in believing in science (both practical and theoretical) and in God. There also is nothing incompatible between science and the Torah. Rav Yosef Ber Solovetchik was quoted saying something along the lines of the following: Those who see a contradiction between science and the Torah – either do not understand the Torah; do not understand the science. Or do not understand either

I agree.

Just because a scientific phenomenon seems to contradict what the Torah seems to be telling us does not mean that one of them is false. All it means is that we need a better understanding of one or both. This is the way I feel and I am proud to be a believer in both the Torah and science. And I thank both my Rebbe, Rav Ahron Soloveichik and Dr. Solar for guiding me in both.

Warning: As in all conversations like this, debating God’s existence will not be tolerated. Nor will debating the truth of the Torah be tolerated. This is an Orthodox Jewish blog which assumes the truth of both.

Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman

I am not going to see the movie. Not for the reasons given by Alexandra Fleksher in her Cross Currents article. But because I am simply not a fan of Wonder Woman. I could never relate to that comic book character. I was a Superman fan. (And had quite the collection of Superman comic books when I was a child.)

Wonder Woman was recently released to the ‘big screen’ and has all but dominated the entertainment news. Jewish publications are fawning all over the fact that Ms. Gal Gadot - an Israeli actress - is portraying the title character. Some of the coverage has to do with Muslim nations boycotting the film. Secular publications are all abuzz about director Patty Jenkins - extolling her achievement as a new height in movie-making for a woman in this genre. Critical reviews of this move have been excellent. Far better than most of the more recent films of this genre.

Gal Gadot is an Israeli model turned actress who is also a proud veteran of the Israeli Defense Forces (IDF); a mother; and a homemaker. A Jew that is serious about some of our traditional religious practices (I recall an article about how she religiously lights candles every Friday night before Shabbos.)

Despite all of this, I am not interested. As I said, I am not a fan of the character and have outgrown superhero movies in any case. (Maybe because the recent ones were so bad.)

There are two articles on the subject that have piqued my curiosity about those movies. One of them - as menioned above - is by Alexandra Fleksher. I found it to be both a wonderful defense of Shmiras Eynayim (Guarding your eyes) and yet a bit condescending in making that point.

Orthodox Judaism urges that men ‘guard their eyes’. This means that we men are supposed to avoid looking at women in ways that can arouse sexual thoughts about them. The less clothed they are, the more we should avoid looking at them. Mrs. Fleksher’s husband is doing exactly that as a matter of principle. He is observing Shmiras Eynayim. This is how she begins her article:

Last Shabbos, Wonder Woman came up quite a lot. Friday night dinner with guests, Shabbos lunch at guests, and at kiddush after davening. Men were the ones who brought it up. My 14 year old son said some classmates are seeing it with their fathers. Our Friday night male guest said it’s not so bad unless you have a problem seeing lots of arm…

I have seen the Facebook posts of friends who say, with lots of exclamation points, that it is breathtaking and truly a marvel. Articles I have read applaud Wonder Woman for its revolutionary film-making in that it is extraordinary in its treatment of women. That it depicts not only a woman heroine, but a vision of womankind not limited by society’s expectations and limitations.

She then says that her husband won’t be seeing it. She may not realize it, but by explaining why her husband won’t see it while other Orthodox friends of hers did, is she not putting them down?

I found that a bit distasteful. Her purpose was obviously to praise her husband. But she should not have mentioned that so many of her other friends were extolling the movie and ignoring the Shmiras Eynayoim issue. She came to praise her husband. Not to bury her friends. But didn’t she kind of do that?

What is somewhat perplexing is that she speaks only about this movie – thereby hinting that her husband might otherwise go to the movies. I’m not sure what principle he is standing up for by avoiding only this particular movie. There is hardly a movie made that these days that doesn’t have a woman in it. And invariably they will not be dressed according to Halachic standards of modesty.

I’m also relatively sure that if her husband participates in the world in some fashion Perhaps at work or in the market place. He therefore regularly comes into contact with live women who do not dress modestly by Halachic standards. Gal Gadot’s Wonder Woman does not violate the norms of modesty of the society in which we live. There is nothing titillating about her superhero costume if you live in America.

And then there is Shoshana Keats-Jaskoll’s fawning review of the movie. Mrs. Keats-Jaskoll has told me personally that she is not a feminist. But her article had feminism written all over it. She used Wonder Woman as model for all Jewish Women. She compared the social construct of Wonder Woman’s world to the social construct of Orthodox Judaism in negative ways. Here is an excerpt from her Times of Israel article that demonstrates this:

How moving, how norm-shattering to see women make their own choices, fight their own battles, on their own terms, no permission needed, no dress code required, and no one telling them just how far they could go.

I don’t think the president of the Jewish Orthodox Feminist Alliance (JOFA) could have put it any better. She seems to see Tznius issues as a hindrance to her freedom.

I cannot think of 2 more different reactions to this movie. One criticizes Tznius violations while the other praises the glory of giving women the freedom to be who they are without caring about how they dress. Both of these women have modern Orthodox backgrounds. I don’t think they could be further apart.

Ron Yitzchok Eisenman: Charedi or not Charedi?

Rabbi Ron Yitzchok Eisenman distributes a weekly ‘Short Vort’ to his congregants and anyone else interested in what he has to say on any given event or matter in the Jewish world. His latest contribution asks a question that most of us would seem to have a ready answer to: Are you Charedi?

He asks this question in light of the recent trip taken by Israel Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu. He was flown to his destination by a female Charedi pilot. The Prime Minister made note of that with the following ‘tweet’:

“We are now going to meet with the first Hareidi woman pilot. You are invited to join. She is the first, but not the last.”

Rabbi Eisenman was moved to ask the following question based in this event: What exactly about this woman makes her Charedi? Using the definition found in Wikipedia, it would seem that she clearly not Charedi. Here is how it is defined there.

“Hareidi Judaism is a broad spectrum of groups within Orthodox Judaism, all characterized by a rejection of modern secular culture…”
“In contrast to Modern Orthodox Judaism, which hastened to embrace modernity, the approach of the Chareidim was to maintain a steadfast adherence both to Jewish Law and custom by segregating themselves from modern society.”

Rabbi Eisenman notes that Ms. Spiegel/Novak would not qualify by this definition. And yet I’m pretty sure she self identifies that way. He concludes the vort with following:

I am just wondering what makes me or you or anyone else Hareidi?What makes one Modern Orthodox?What makes one Chassidish?Do we really need these categories?Are they really helpful for our spiritual development?Just wondering…

These are all excellent questions that I have not really dealt with at any length. I thought I’d give it a shot. Before I begin I should make clear that there is a lot of overlap at the edges. And there are many exceptions. But I do believe that each category can be defined.

Let me answer the last question first. The answer is no. Categories do not help our spiritual development. If anything they do the opposite. Unfortunately they have thrust upon us by those who have decided break away from the mainstream and create their own categories. We therefore have no choice but to define who we are in contradistinction to those that have rejected some of our values.

Being Chasidish is rather easy to define. While there are individual differences between various sects of Chasidim, they are generally people that follow the dictates of a given leader called the Rebbe whom they see as the holiest human being alive - closer to God than anyone else on earth. They therefore honor him in the extreme and see his blessings as the most potent because of it.

They follow the unique customs and lifestyles that he or the founding Rebbe established. Customs that include unique personal grooming (long Peyes and usually a full beard) and a unique manner of dress. They are encouraged to isolate themselves as much as possible from the general culture so as to avoid what they see as values that are anathema to their beliefs.

Modern Orthodox Jews are those that observe Halacha and tradition while embracing those parts of the culture that are permitted by Halacha.

Charedim (that are not Chasidic) is a category that rejects modern culture too (except for those things that are necessary or beneficial to one’s health and well being). But they do not have a Rebbe nor do they have the personal grooming habits of Chasidm, They do not have long Peyes Nor long beards and usually trim them. They dress in modern clothing (e.g. a suit and tie for men). And do not isolate themselves as much.

They are generally better educated than Chasidim in secular subjects, often getting advanced degrees, getting good jobs or becoming professionals. They also tend to be more involved in the culture either through their jobs or in their lifestyles - albeit some with guilt. While they do venerate their rabbinic leaders (usually a Rosh Yeshiva), they do not see them in the same way Chasidim see their Rebbe as a near God-like figure. (Although there has been some movement towards that type of veneration in the last few years among the more right wing Charedim calling it Daas Torah.)

Why the term Charedi? It is rooted in the expression Chareid L’Dvar HaShem – trembling at the word of God. (It is found in Tanach I believe. Sorry to say I can’t quote the actual source.)

This is a term chosen by Charedim themselves. I would have thought that describing one’s group as trembling is not very flattering. But they see it differently. They want the world to know that they tremble at the awesomeness of an omnipotent God that has the power of life and death over all things. And Who judges every single act by every human being.

The consequences of not doing God’s will is spelled out quite graphically in the Torah. It isn’t pretty. There is also the matter of an afterlife that will deal with all of our actions here on earth – rewarding those that follow His word and punishing those that violate it. So they ‘tremble’ at the possibility that they may not be serving God’s word properly and suffer some very dire consequences both in this world and the next.

Rabbi Yosef Bechoffer once mentioned to me that it bothered him that Charedim co-opted that term for themselves. We should all be Chareid L’Dvar HaShem. That, he says is a positive characteristic. Yes, we should all fear God, I agree. But does not mean we lead our lives in the trembling fashion that the term implies nor should we identify that way. That is certainly not how I would choose to identify. But that is their choice.

What about Rabbi Eisenman’s question about Ms. Ms. Spiegel/Novak? If she does not eschew modern culture and does not separate herself from it, why does she consider herself Charedi?

I believe there are several reasons for that. First she was raised in a community that has those values. Becoming a commercial pilot is indeed a departure from their norms. But my guess is that aside from becoming a pilot, she is Charedi in every other way.

I doubt for example that she has a TV in her home, Or that she attends movies. Or theater. Or is she a fan of Justin Beiber or Beyonce. I’m sure her children attend Charedi schools. Separate seating at public events like a wedding or a banquet are the norm. Her husband is probably well entrenched into that world, whether still in Kollel or as a working Charedi. I doubt that her husband or any of her children were in the army. Her close friends are probably all Charedi and the Shul she and her family attends is probably Charedi too. In short she lives the Charedi lifestyle despite having a career no other Charedi has – man or woman.

I wonder, though, how her community reacts to her? Are they accepting? If not do they hide it? Or have they created some distance between her and themselves?

As noted above, sometimes the lines are blurred between categories. I’m not sure how that manifests itself in Israel. But in the US the blurring of lines between Moderate Charedim and Centrist Modern Orthodox Jews is already happening in a big way. And creating a new mainstream of Orthodoxy I have called sociological centrists. While the two groups will still retain their own unique values, their lifestyles hardly differ.

With the extremes of the right and left seeming to go off the deep end and heterodoxy seeing their numbers dwindling by an assimilating mass exodus, intermarriage, or being defined out of Judaism as defined by Halacha (via patrilinial descent or improper conversions)...who knows? Maybe the new sociological centrist (consisting of moderate Charedim, Centrist modern Orthodox Jews, and Jews that we have successfully reached out to) whose numbers are swelling will eventually be able to shed any kind of label and be known simply as Jews.

Is that a good thing? Yes and no. Shedding labels is good. But the loss of so many Jews from Judaism is a tragedy beyond description!

Last Thursday I wrote a post describing the reaction of 2 woman - Alexandra Fleksher and Shoshana Keats-Jaskoll - to the movie Wonder Woman. Both women have Modern Orthodox backgrounds. Both seem to live modern Orthodox lifestyles. But their views about that movie could not have been further apart. Both women have responded in the comments section of my blog. And both took issue with me.

Ms. Fleksher’s disagreements were spelled out in gentle tones. My response to her is that I basically stand by what I said.

Ms. Keats Jaskoll seemed to be almost insulted by what I said about her and responded with a much harsher tone. Here is what she said:

Harry, I am certainly a feminist in that I believe women should achieve what they can without being told 'no' and should be treated as people. Tzniut is not (only) about dress. Dress is what men have made it into and yes, I'm sick of the unholy practice of men inspecting and judging women's clothing and making them feel like their bodies are vehicles of sin. The movie was incredible and anyone who has seen has the right to judge it. I stand by what I wrote. Shame you choose to focus on one thing and interpret in such a negative way

Here is my response:

Negative? What about my description of your review of the movie Wonder Woman makes you see it as negative? You are a feminist. There is no doubt about that. But I did not say it in a pejorative way. I did not say whether that is negative or positive. Just stated the obvious. However, by the way you put it, you imply that you are not a feminist in other ways? Which ways would that be?

The fact is that the way you describe yourself as a feminist is the way I describe my own identity as a feminist:

I believe women should achieve what they can without being told 'no' and should be treated as people.

That is exactly the way I feel. Where I part company with you is only when it applies to Judaism as understood by the vast majority of the rabbinic leaders of our time. Leaders from across the entire spectrum of Orthodoxy. Including rabbis on the Moetzes of the Agudah, the Israeli Chief Rabbinate, the European Rabbinate, the RCA, and OU.

It is only the rabbis of the extreme left – none of whom have anywhere near the credentials of the above-mentioned rabbinic leaders to make such decisions that support applying it to Judaism. You are free to agree with them. And I respect your opinion, even though I profoundly disagree agree with it.

In you review of the movie, you completely ignore the issues raised by Ms. Fleksher as though they do not exist. The only reference you make to it is in a very negative tone:

I'm sick of the unholy practice of men inspecting and judging women's clothing and making them feel like their bodies are vehicles of sin.

What conclusion do you expect readers to take from that? I actually agree with you that women should not be made to feel like their bodies are vehicles of sin. But that doesn’t mean the concerns about modesty issues in matters of clothing aren’t legitimate.

For the record I would personally have no issue with seeing this movie even though the protagonist is clearly violating even the most liberal interpretation of our modesty laws as they apply to clothing. That's because the focus of this movie is on action, special effects and the subliminal message of empowering women. In other words, normal men will not be looking at her in sexual ways. They will be looking at her in much the same way they view a male superhero... as a superhero. Not a sex symbol as Ms. Fleksher suggests it might. The only reason I will not be seeing it is because Wonder Woman is not a character I can identify with - and in any case I have lost interest in superhero movies.

To say I am disappointed with your take on my post would be an understatement. I generally agree with what you write most of the time. But because I point out the inconsistency of telling me you are not a feminist on the one hand and what you said in your article on the other... and the fact that you ignored and even disparaged the Tznius issue - you feel unjustifiably attacked by me.

That said, I still respect you and will continue to read your opinion on these matters when you write about them. You are an intelligent person that writes with conviction about things that have great meaning to to Klal Yisroel. You have added much to the conversation and I'm sure you will continue to do so.

R' Nosson Tzvi Finkel (center) in an 8th grade class picture

Last night I had the privilege of attending the Arie Crown Hebrew Day School 70^th anniversary banquet.

Now I’ve been around the block a few times. I have attended more than my share of banquets and frankly I have had enough of the ‘same old, same old’. And if I never saw another banquet again, it would be too soon. Last night I had kind of the same feeling before I went to the banquet. Even though I am a huge supporter of this alma mater of my children… a banquet is a banquet is a banquet.

But because I have so much gratitude to the school for what they did for my children and for what they do for so many others… and the fact that the sole honorees for the evening were the principal, Rabbi Eli Samber and his wife Ahuva, both of whom I have tremendous admiration for, I attended. And I must say I am glad I did.

It not only reminded me why I love this school so much, it did so much more. The evening began with the national anthem and the Hatikvah. The tables were mixed seating. I got to sit with my wife for a change. That is becoming an increasing rarity as the Orthodox Jewish world continues to move to the right.

Women in Arie Crown are not invisible. Every video that evening featured both the men and the women of Arie Crown. Including an interview with Mrs. Samber. It also featured many other such images. Including Rebbetzin Esther Levine. Who has been teaching there for decades and happens to be the wife of Telshe Rosh HaYeshiva, and Agudah Moetzes member, Rav Avrohom Chaim Levine. The evening included several female speakers, including some of the 8^th grade graduates.

The women of Arie Crown are respected! This is not to say that the more right wing institutions in Chicago don’t respect their women. I know that they do. But women never appear before an audience where men are present. Nor are they of late featured in any video presentation or print ads for their institutions. Not so Arie Crown. Arie Crown not only appreciates their women, they make sure that they are not made invisible.

Even that was not the highlight of the evening. The tribute to Rabbi and Mrs. Samber was filled with genuine love by the entire Arie Crown family, the administration of the school, the Vaad HaChinuch, the teachers (both religious studies and secular studies) the members of the board, the parent body and the students - both past and present all expressed the love and admiration they have for this couple.

But for me, even that was not the highlight of the evening. The highlight was in one particular video presentation of what this school is all about. If I were to create a school based on my Hashkafos, it would be Arie Crown. If there were a school logo it would be “Chanoch L’Naar Al Pi Darko’. Educate the child according to his way. Each child has their strengths. Arie Crown is not a cookie cutter school. In Arie Crown there are no strong or weak students. Each student brings to the table their own personal strengths. Arie Crown seeks to find those strengths in each child and teaches them accordingly. In Arie Crown ‘No child left behind’ is more than preached. It is practiced.

The video presentation last night showed what happened to some of the former graduates of the school. It was a sort of ‘where are they now’. Well they are all over the world excelling in a variety of fields – having chosen their fields based on how they could serve God best. Rav Gedaliah Finkel is one such graduate that is currently one of the Roshei Yeshiva at Mir Yerushalayim. He praised his education at Arie Crown. (What was not said in the video is that his older brother was the late Gadol and Rosh HaYeshiva of Mir, Rav Nosson Tzvi Finkelwho was also a graduate of Arie Crown. That should not be overlooked.) Another graduate interviewed that praised the Chinuch he recevied in the school is R' Chaim Soloveichik, Rav Ahron Soloveichik’s youngest son.

Various other highly successful people were interviewed that had graduated Arie Crown. Among them graduates that have decided to make Aliyah and are currently serving in the Israeli Defense Forces.

Included were female physicians, nurses, teachers, principals Roshei Yeshiva, an NCSY leader in Israel… and leaders of business and industry, from to traditional to high tech.

All of these people expressed gratitude to Arie Crown and the kind of education they got that influenced their life decisions. It was not only about the philosophy of the school, it was (and still is) about the personal interest taken in each student by the teachers, the principal, and the two vice principals (religious and secular studies) that made all this possible for them. Among other things, how many principals know the first name of every single student in the school (over 700 students)? That’s why the vast majority of Arie Crown graduates have only the fondest memories of the school, their teachers, and their principal.

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention Rabbi Samber’s predecessor, Rabbi Meir Shapiro who was at the banquet and was one of the presenters to the Sambers last night. It was Rabbi Shapiro who set the tone for the school over his many decades as principal there. And who is the role model Rabbi Samber tries to emulate. That said, Rabbi Samber has not only tried to live up to Rabbi Shapiro’s legacy, he brought his own personal strengths to the job and helped the school grow to even greater heights.

I could not be prouder of what I saw last night.

Even though I love Arie Crown, I don’t usually fawn over it this way. But I can’t help it. They deserve to be fawned over. And if this sounds like a free ad for Arie Crown… well I guess it is.

But it is more than that. Arie Crown should be seen as the prototype for every Orthodox elementary school in America. If you love your child and want to see you child grow due to his own personal strengths, Arie Crown is the school for you.

Rethinking intermarriage?

I understand his concern. Non Orthodox American Jewry is shrinking at a very rapid rate. I don’t think this is arguable – as a 2013 Pew Research survey sadly demonstrated. But recently Yeshiva Chovevei Torah (YCT) ordained Rabbi Avrom Mlotek’s solution to the problem shows a breathtaking ignorance about what Orthodox Judaism is all about.

Rabbi Mlotek may have his heart in the right place. I’m sure that he does ‘care passionately about Judaism’ as he says he does. He would surely dispute my characterization of his ‘solution’ and probably outright resent my declaring him ignorant of Judaism – especially as a rabbi. But there is really no other way to see what he proposes doing. Here is what he said in a New York Jewish Week article entitled Time to Rethink Our Resistance to Intermarriage:

While the Reform movement has the most welcoming posture towards families with non-Jewish partners, the Conservative and Modern Orthodox worlds would be well served if they adopted a similar approach. Gone are the days when dogma and devotion rule; today every Jew is a Jew by choice. If our traditional communities do not learn how to adapt to modernity and cater religiously to different people’s needs, Judaism risks nearing its extinction date.

There are a lot of things that the various segments of Orthodoxy disagree about. But the one thing we all agree upon was reflected in a YCT statementin obvious response to their recent ordainee:

Besides intermarriage being strictly prohibited halakhically, it poses grave danger to Jewish continuity. Needless to say, we strictly forbid any of our rabbis to perform intermarriages. We do, however, advocate working very hard to convert anyone who sincerely wants to join the Jewish people.

Does Rabbi Mlotek not realize that the Torah does not adapt to modernity? The late Dr. Eliezer Berkovitz was accused by some of the great Torah personalities of his time of being an Apikores for making a similar statement. I recall asking him about that when I was a student in one of his Jewish philosophy classes. He shook his head and said, that he never said that. What he said is that we must apply (not adapt) the Torah to modernity. Huge difference.

Rabbi Mlotek has taken a view that even the controversial Dr. Berkovitz rejected – knowing that it was heretical. The Torah is not adaptable. You can't change the Torah to fit the times. Adapting the Torah to modernity is the province of Conservative Judaism. And even they have not (yet) abandoned that particular Halacha. Which is why Rabbi Mlotek included them in his admonishment.

Rabbi Mlotek must know that Halacha forbids intermarriage and yet he says we should rethink our attitude to it to suit our sociological needs. But even those on the far left extremes of Orhtodoxy that believe we can discard tradition to suit the times - fully agrees that Halacha cannot be discarded. Rabbi Mlotek apparently begs to differ.

What about the problem he seeks to address? Yes, it is a difficult situation brought about in part by heterodox laxity about their members ritual observances. Something many of Conservative Judaism’s great thinkers have themselves asserted. That along with the new found tolerance - and even admiration - by Americans of the Jewish people has fostered an unprecedented climate of assimilation that has resulted in the rapid increase of intermarriages. But performing intermarriages as a way of showing them how much we love them is not the solution!

That being said, I don’t know what we can do to stave off what appears to be the great loss of Jewish souls that we now find ourselves in. The fact is that those among us that intermarry probably care little – if at all – about their Jewishness or that of their children. If the non Jewish spouse is a woman, their child is not considered Jewish. There is nothing anyone can do to change that. Is there anything we can do about this situation? YCT 2nd statement spoke to this concern. But I’m not sure how to react to it. It states:

We as a community have to give deep and careful thought as to how to balance drawing close those in our communities who are intermarried with the risk of sending a harmful message of condoning intermarriage rather than doing everything we can to prevent it.

I tend to agree with them in principle. The devil though is in the details. It is a noble goal to try and keep fellow Jews Jewish no matter how far outside of their heritage they have traveled. But how do we invite an intermarried couple into our midst without appearing to condone their union?

Much as I would like to keep the Jewish spouse in the fold by giving the couple a warm and welcoming place in our community – in the hope that he will someday realize the value of his Jewish heritage; become serious about observance; and convince his spouse (and children if the non Jewish spouse is a woman) to undergo a sincere and valid conversion - welcoming them in as an intermarried couple is a non starter. What are we to do in the likelihood that they will refuse to change once we have accepted them? That can easily devolve into full acceptance! That is a rabbit hole that once we go down into it - can destroy us all as Jews.

The Kotel (Israel Hayom)

This may surprise or even shock some people. But for me, the Kotel has never inspired me. ((I may have mentioned this before.)

Now it’s true that this wall is the outer retaining wall of what was once the holiest of structures, the Beis HaMikdash. And yet, every time I visit it, I feel like I am at a tourist attraction.

There is almost a circus like atmosphere surrounding it with all kinds of people with obvious mental issues hanging out there. There is an overabundance of people begging for charity (Knowledgeable people in Israel have told me that most of them are fraudulent and should not be given any money. Although that seems to have been cleaned up a bit the last few times I went there.)

There is little doubt that this is the one destination people ‘must visit’ on their first trip to Israel. And subsequent trips as well. Much like Masada is. People (men and women) come there in all manner of dress. Some of which I would say is inappropriate.

Because of all this whenever I go there, I just do not feel inspired. On the occasions I do go, I try to pray at that portion of the Kotel that has a Shul attached to it. Once you are in there, there is little resemblance to the famous image everyone has of the Kotel. It has the look and the feel of a regular Shul. And yet it is as much a part of the Kotel as the big sprawling outside wall that is the widely known image of it.

Nevertheless the Kotel is what it is: the closest place to the Holy Temple that all Poskim agree we may tread upon. And many people do come there to pray. Men on their side of the Mechitza there and women on theirs.

The funny thing is that I did not see the Kotel that way until I actually visited it. My images were those of the archival footage. Having been born at the end of 1946, I never saw the Kotel in our possession prior to 1967 where upon a Mechtiza was installed shortly after we got it back. Based on that footage, I used to see it as the holy pace that it is and not the tourist attraction it seems like now.

A few fervent Jews would to come and pray in solemnity free of the ‘circus’ like atmosphere I experience when I go there. Which causes me to be quite jaded by it.

Which brings me to the current strife taking place at the Kotel these days. The latest development is the desire by heterodox movements to create an egalitarian space by the Kotel that would allow men and women to pray there together. A compromise to that effect was reached by the Keneset in 2016 whereby the primary Kotel Plaza would be left intact and undisturbed in its current Orthodox orientation. A nearby section of the Kotel known as Roninson’s Arch would be expanded and made more accessible.

The Charedi parties did not oppose it because they saw it as a way of ending the controversy and leaving the traditional Kotel as they would like it to be. I supported that move because I saw it as a peace making move. Israel could use a bit less controversy. This was a step in that direction.

But there seems to have been a change of heart. The Chief Rabbinate is fighting that compromise and does not want to allow any portion of the Kotel to be used for egalitarian purposes.

Why the change? More on that later.

First I should make clear a fundamental Halacha about the requirement to separate the sexes for prayer. It only exists in a Shul. Outside of a Shul, women do not need to be separated from men by a Mechitza. One can see the application of this at any wedding hall where the men will gather to pray with an ad hoc Minyan after a Chupah ceremony. Women are clearly present and ambient around that Minyan. There is no Mechitza and people from all segments of Orthodox Jewry will join them. Even members of the Agudah Moetzes .

It should also be noted that in some of the archival footage of the Kotel I mentioned above men and women are praying at the Kotel without separation. The reason they could do that is because the Kotel is not a Shul. Which is the only placed that requires a Mechitza separating the sexes for prayer.

So why is there a Mechitza at the Kotel now? I’ve been told that when it was restored to Israel in 67, soit was inundated with worshippers desiring to pray there. It became almost impossible to pray without men and women coming into physical contact with each other. From that moment forward there has always been a Mechitza separating men and women at the Kotel. Until recently it was respected by all who visited. But now heterodox movements have been increasingly pressuring Israel to allow heir people to pray in the egalitarian fashion they are used to. That obviously caused disruption. The above mentioned compromise would have ended it.

If there is no problem with men and women praying together at the Kotel, why hasn’t the compromise been implemented –and the strife ended? Wasn’t that the intent of the Charedi parties by not protesting it? Well, yes. But there is more to the story which is not being reported, making it seem like the entire issue is about a Halacha requiring the separation of the sexes at the Kotel. But as mentioned, that is a Halacha that does not exist.

(I should note that the current Kotel Plaza might now be considered a Shul. In which case Halacha dictates the separation of the sexes when praying there. But that is certainly not true for Robinson’s Arch. There has never been a designation of any kind of Shul there.)

What exactly is the Halachic issue then?

I have been told by a rabbi who wishes to remain anonymous and was directly involved in the original negotiations resulting in that compromise that the heterodox rabbis wanted more than just a space for egalitarian purposes. They insisted that as part of the deal the state recognize them as a legitimate denomination.

It is one thing to give heterodox rabbis permission to use a section of the Kotel for their own purposes. I supported doing that reluctantly in order to end the conflict. But I oppose legitimizing movements that I believe are not legitimate. I therefore support the Charedim, the Chief Rabbinate, and the Religious Zionists (as represented in the Kenesset by Naftai Bennett’s party, Bayit HaYehudi) opposition to it.

The best outcome here would be for heterodox rabbis to drop their insistence on official recognition, and the Charedim et al to give them their space at the Kotel. This way everybody gets something but nobody gets everything. Isn’t that what compromise is all about?

Orthodox students - the future of American Jewry (Associated Talmud Torahs)

I cry for our people. Never in my lifetime would I have ever believed that the Jewish people would be undergoing another Holocaust. Not a physical one. Physically, we have never had is better. We live at a time and in a place that has given us unprecedented acceptance and freedom. Never in our history as a Jewish people have we been allowed to do whatever we want and be whoever we want to be.

We can be a Satmar Chasid in Williamsburg or an assimilated Jew that has intermarried. In our world today, it simply doesn’t matter to anyone what our religion is or what our religious practices are. With so many Jews in an unpopular Trump administration – many of whom are suffering the brunt of so much media criticism, I have never heard the word Jew or Jewish mentioned once. Never! Only the Jewish media makes any mention of it.

This obvious blessing for which I am very grateful is also a curse. Because it has enabled (one might even say encouraged) so many of us to assimilate to the point of intermarriage! To the great approval of our fellow non Jewish citizens. Which studies have shown admire the Jewish people more than any other demographic.

According to respected studies, this has resulted in the distinct possibility that unless one remains observant (whose practitioners are found mostly within Orthodoxy) the concept of an American Jewry as it exists today will one day be a distant memory. If that is not a spiritual Holocaust, I don’t know what is.

(I have never used the term Holocaust before in any other context other than the obvious one. That’s because I resented when it was used by others for their own agenda. That tended to make comparisons to the Holocaust which were clearly not of the same magnitude. Thus doing a grave injustice to actual Holocaust survivors and their families. But I am making an exception because of how serious this matter is. And it is not going away.)

Although the statistics found by the Pew research study have been disputed by some people, I don’t think it is arguable anymore. Here is yet another nail in that coffin from JTA:

According to a new analysis by the Jewish People Policy Institute, or JPPI, analyzing stats on “non-haredi” American Jews aged 25 to 54, “just 21 percent are married to Jews, while well over twice as many [50 percent] are non-married and 29 percent are intermarried.” Only 15 percent of this cohort are in Jewish-Jewish marriages with Jewish children at home.

The implication, once you exclude the haredi Orthodox — as well as the modern Orthodox, who often marry before age 25 — is that the non-Orthodox Jewish population is in a steep demographic decline, perhaps perilously so.

The handwriting is on the wall. And rabbis of all denominations are reacting to it… trying to find solutions. The most common reaction to it by heterodox rabbis is to ‘go with the flow’. They are suggesting that since intermarriage is already happening it does not do us any good to apply our old paradigm of rejecting intermarried couples. In the not so distant past, if a child married out, parents would sit Shiva on them – as though they had died.

Even non observant parents were anguished – even horrified - if their son or daughter brought home a non Jewish fiancé for them to meet. That’s why there were so many sham conversions. Even though those parents were mostly non observant themselves and did not raise their children that way, they still wanted their children to marry ‘in’ and to have Jewish children. Today that is hardly the case anymore, it seems. Parents are more likely to be accepting of circumstances. Even in those rare instances where it happens in an Orthodox family. I am not judging anyone. Just stating a fact. That surely contributes to the accelerated pace of extinction.

As noted - the talk by rabbis from a variety of denominations seems to be pointing in the direction of welcoming intermarried couples into our midst. Turning centuries of tradition on its head. The argument is that if we don’t – we will lose them forever. Welcoming them in will ensure a connection that will keep that family Jewish at some level. Reform Judaism has already permitted their rabbis to perform intermarriages. Conservative Judaism is on the precipice of doing so. And even graduates of the Yeshiva Chovevei Torah (YCT) have expressed a view that we ought to change course.

That argument was made by YCT alumnus Rabbi Avrom Mlotek. To which YCT felt it needed to reiterate in a public statement that they forbid their rabbis to perform intermarriages. In another article yet another alumnus of YCT, Rabbi Aaron Potek, had a similar approach:

I’ve become much less interested in the question of whether one should date or marry Jewish. By focusing on the act of intermarriage, we ignore the far more significant questions: what role does Judaism play in your life, and what do you want your Judaism to look like in a romantic relationship?

While well intended all of these responses overlook the obvious. We are not going to change the steep demographic decline by welcoming intermarried couples into our midst. That will only accelerate the process. The more we allow that, the more the Jewish community will have non Jews pretending to be Jews by performing a ritual or two.

It is highly unlikely that a goal of Teshuva (with the non Jewish spouse undergoing a sincere conversion and both of the becoming observant Jews) will take place. What is far more likely is that there will be no sincere conversion and that they will remain mostly non observant and at best become cultural Jews. And one of them will not even be Jewish. This is not a happy outcome.

I wish it were not so. The extinction of American Jewry is a tragedy of unprecedented proportion. As I indicated, I cry for our people! But if this trend continues (and there is every expectation that it will despite all of the hand-wringing) there is precious little we can to do about it at this point.

That doesn’t mean we don’t try. That is what outreach is all about. Chabad, NCSY, Aish HaTorah, JEP, Chicago Torah Network… and many other such organizations have been doing it successfully for many years. But their successes are a drop in the bucket compared to the steep demographic decline attributable to assimilation and intermarriage that seems to be steamrolling most of our people out of Judaism.

We must face that unpleasant fact. It’s happening. To borrow a phrase used by former Vice President Al Gore about climate change, it is an inconvenient truth. And diluting our community by welcoming non Jews as a part of it is not an answer.

I know it’s difficult to just say ‘No’. But saying ‘No’ to intermarriage is the only real option. The loss will be humongous! Unprecedented. And very sad. But Judaism will survive. It will consist of the kind of observant Jews that are found mostly within Orthodoxy. (I suspect that those that are observant and not part of Orthodoxy, will someday become part of it because they will have no other place to go. But then again. we will no longer carry that label. We will just all be Jews!)

Am I being triumphalist? Not a chance. I cry for what we have already lost and what we are about to lose.

Young Charedi extremist in action (Jerusalem Post - 2009)

In the continuing saga of Jews that adhere to extreme forms of Judaism that have been increasingly making life miserable for everyone else, we have a new development designed to counter it. From NPR:

The court ruling requires El Al to instruct its staff in writing that such requests (asking that seats be changed for religious reasons) are illegal and train workers in the new rule within six months.

This ruling was made in the context of an 85 year old woman suing the airline for pressuring her to give up her seat to another passenger. He refused to sit next to a woman for religious reasons (for fear of having inadvertent contact with her). Changing your seat on an aircraft for this reason is not required by Halacha by most mainstream Poskim. But the Poskim of the more extreme elements require their adherents to do whatever they can to achieve it. This has resulted in request by men from this segment to request a seat change from flight attendants.

Asking seats to be switched is not all that uncommon. I have occasionally found myself sitting separate from my wife when we book airline tickets late. My wife and I do not want to disturb others and we just sit where we are. But it is not unreasonable for people to ask if they can switch with the person sitting next to their spouse so that they can sit together. This is also common when parents are seated far from where their children are. It is natural for parents to want to be seated near their children. I have no issue with that.

But I do have an issue with what has been happening lately with the extremists from this community. It would be one thing to request a seat change for religious reasons. That should not be treated with any less respect than requests being made for those other reasons.

But that is not what has been happening. In far too many cases they don’t just ask. They demand. And that has in some cases turned into a long delays inconveniencing all the other passengers.Some flights have been delayed for hours because of it. I am therefore quite happy with this ruling even though it was brought by an organization that I normally oppose, IRAC. When they’re right, they’re right.

Respecting one’s religious needs is at the foundation of any democracy where freedom of religion reins supreme. I believe that just like America, Israel has that as its bedrock position. But nothing can be taken to the extreme. Especially when it affects others. That El Al is now forbidden from accommodating extremist religious values is the fault of the way these extremists have handled themselves. They have acted with a militant resolve that their religious views be accommodated.

In a democracy such as Israel’s they surely had the right to ask for religious accommodation. But if they are refused, for whatever reason - that should be the end of it. But increasingly in some cases they will not take no for an answer and cause disruption and inconvenience to everyone on the plane until they get their way. That is just plain wrong. And an Israeli court has reacted.

Why, one might ask, wouldn’t a passenger give up their seat to another passenger to accommodate his religious beliefs if it doesn’t matter to them? Isn't that just being mean? No. It isn’t. Changing a seat is not just a question of ‘sitting here instead of there’ without consequences.

People choose certain seats on a flight for a reason. They might do so because they prefer an aisle seat; or a window seat. And no one likes to sit in the middle of a 3 seat row on an aircraft if that is what the trade involves.

Couples usually like to sit together and buy seats in tandem. When someone asks to switch with a person who has chosen a seat for a particular reason he may very well be asking them to give up that seat and accept a seat they purposely chose to avoid.

There are some people kind enough to sacrifice their comfort for the religious sensibilities of others. But no one should be pressured to give up the seat they chose for a lesser seat if they don’t want to. Why should a woman in an aisle seat sitting next to her husband exchange seats away from her husband - with the guy in the last row who was sitting in the middle seat between 2 passengers? No one should be pressured or embarrassed into doing that.

You reap what you sow. Had there not been a number cases where extremist zealots insisted on seat changes - causing havoc in the process, I doubt this ruling would have ever been made. Now that it has, they are going to have to live with it. If they try to cause a commotion, I'm pretty sure they will be thrown off the flight.

I have no sympathy for them. They are the same people that yell and scream at Charedi soldiers when they come into their neighborhoods in Meah Shearim. They are same ones that yell and scream at women who dare to sit at the front of a male-female segregated bus – sometimes using physical force to assure it.

They are the same people from who demonstrate violently against the government for a variety of reasons. In some instances damaging public property in the process. Even causing health hazards by burning dumpsters in their neighborhoods.

They are the same people that yell and scream at 7 year old Religious Zionist girls – calling them whores. They are same people that will harass a group of religious Zionist teenagers that passes through their neighborhoods not dressed to their extreme modesty standards (although well within the Halachic standards of most of orthodoxy.) They are the Israeli flag burners. They are the people who dressed up in Nazi prison uniforms during a protest a few years ago to make the point that their government acts like Nazis.

In short, these are the people that have no clue how to behave in a civilized world. Why would they? They live in isolation from it! They should therefore be treated that way. I guess this court decided to do so. If they continue acting in their extreme ways they will only generate an even more extreme response by Israel - as suggested in a VIN report. A former police general in Israel wants to see rubber bullets being fired at these protesters. Now I don't want to see guns of any type being fired at any Jew and I oppose that tactic. But these extremists seem to be asking for it.

One of the topics frequently addressed here is the unfortunate circumstance of Chilul HaShem. This is an explicit command by God to the Jewish people:

“And you shall not desecrate My Holy name; and I shall be sanctified in the midst of the children of Israel. I am the Lord who sanctifies you (Vayikra - 22:32)

We should instead be doing everything we can to sanctify God’s name. That is not done only by following the letter of God’s law. As the Ramban notes, we must go beyond the letter of the law. Or else we may end up being a Naval B’Reshus HaTorah. An individual might find enough loopholes in Halacha to be acting within the letter of it - and yet still be a disgusting person. Thereby causing a Chilul HaShem.

Unfortunately there have been far too many cases where that has been the case. There have been many instances of Jews skirting the law with fraudulent practices that they believed were technically within the letter of Jewish law (a questionable belief at best). Thankfully we live at a time and in a culture that is generally not antisemstic. And we have not all been painted with a broad brush as fraudsters. I’m not sure, however, that the generous spirit of the American people will continue if these types of things keep happening.

This brings me to a book published by Feldheim that is reviewed by Rabbi Yosef Gavriel Bechhofer in the current issue of Jewish Action. It s entitled, Making It Work: A Practical Guide to Halacha in the Workplace by Ari Wasserman. The book addresses this issue as well as a number of other issues regarding a Jew in the workplace. And it is a welcome addition to the collection of English language Seforim published by the religiously right wing publishing houses. My only quibble is that it has taken until now for them to come with a book like this.

True – better late than never. But I have to wonder how much more Chilul HaShem we could have been spared if this attitude would have been there from the start.

It took a high profile Chasidic Rebbe to be convicted of money laundering and tax evasion for the Agudah to start dealing with this more publicly. And I’m not sure they are anywhere near doing it enough.

What took them so long? Why did they wait until a major Chilul HaShem like that occurred until they said anything publicly? Rabbi Bechhofer gives us a glimpse into their past thinking on this issue with the following anecdote:

Several years ago, I wanted to publish a piece on racism in the Orthodox community in a certain Orthodox Jewish publication. A member of the publication’s editorial board vetoed the idea. He explained that he himself categorically rejects and abhors any form of racism in our community. However, he does not believe that these attitudes can be eradicated by writing about them. He therefore preferred not to “wash our dirty linen in public” by raising the issue altogether.

He went on to say that for this reason he also discourages the publication of articles on honesty in matters of Choshen Mishpat. He reiterated that he categorically rejects manifestations of dishonesty and impropriety in our community. But, he continued, while any such conduct is utterly wrong, he understands its antecedents in the unjust financial policies imposed on the Jews by non-Jewish governments and institutions in pre-war Europe. Therefore, he opined, it is almost impossible to eradicate such failings, and in this area too, it is better to not wash our dirty linen in public.

This is a major fallacy. ‘Cover it up, lest people will think ill of us!’

What does it say about our values when the way we try to convince the world of our high sense of ethics is by covering up wrongdoing instead of condemning it? Which is what ‘not airing our dirty linen in public’ actually means. That only makes the Chilul HaShem greater upon the inevitable discovery of the cover-up.

I’m happy that this problem is beginning to be dealt with more publicly. But a speech at a convention here and there, and a book on the subject is not enough. Yeshivos and day schools have to get more serious about it.

Ethics ought to begin in the home. Unfortunately there doesn’t seem to be enough of it transmitted by parents to their children. The schools therefore must pick up the slack. They need to get as serious about teaching these kinds of ethics as they are about teaching Gemarah to boys and Tznius to girls.

Teachers must be trained to do so properly. And hammer it into the psyches of every single student. And hope that it sticks! If we don’t do that yet another Chilul HaShem is inevitable.

Education on this subject can begin by citing the following Gemarah. This was done 25 years ago by Rav Ahron Soloveichik in his book Logic of the Heart Logic of the Mind (P 65-66).

This Gemarah is used the same way by Ari Wasserman in his book. This is what every religious Jew should think and the way they should act:

The Tanna Rabbi Shimon ben Shetach dealt in flax. Seeking to ease his workload, his students purchased a donkey for him from a non-Jew. When the donkey was delivered, Rabbi Shimon ben Shetach discovered a very valuable pearl attached to its ear. The proceeds of its sale would have allowed him to give up the flax business altogether. From a halachic standpoint, he was not obligated to return the pearl to the donkey’s former owner, but he chose to give it back for one reason: the potential for a kiddush Hashem. The non-Jew gratefully accepted the pearl, saying, “Blessed is the God of the Jews!” Rabbi Shimon ben Shetach’s exceptional honesty was credited not only to himself, but, above all, to the “God of the Jews.

Women of the Wall leader, Anat Hoffman

One of the things I love about the Sephardi community is their Achdus. There is no such thing as a denomination in their world. Doesn’t exist. There is just one category: They are all simply Jews. No Orthodox. No Conservative. No Reform. Their rabbinic leadership resides in the man or men they see as the most learned of their time. As was the case with the late Rav Ovadia Yosef.

It didn’t matter how observant one was. Even if not Shomer Shabbos. Rav Ovadia was the man that decided Jewish law for his time and if you were a Sephardi you didn’t dispute it. Sephardim did not look to other rabbis if they didn’t like what they heard. If there was ever a community where Mesorah mattered, it is the Sephardi community.

How I wish this were the case among Ashkenazi Jewry. Alas, Achdus is not something we Ashkenazi Jews can claim with any degree of sincerity. We do have denominations. We even have denominations within denominations. There are people among us that are constantly thinking of ways to separate from the mainstream and do their own thing. It started in the 19^thcentury with the enlightenment and Reform. And by now we probably have more movements and denominations than we can count. Each segment claiming their rabbis are the most direct conduit to knowing the will of God.

This phenomenon is one of the reasons we have the kinds of problems we are currently experiencing at the Kotel. Denominationalism (for lack of a better term) has caused the masses to veer away from the kinds authorities that we have always looked to in the past - as Sephardim do now. The world of Jewry has been led astray by the founders and leaders of these movements to believe that they too are following God’s law, even (as is the case in Reform) they do not require a single Mitzvah to be performed. Generations have been raised in this philosophy or variations of it in other denominations.

Back to the Kotel. Apparently Prime Minister Netanyahu has succumbed to pressure from the Charedi parties in Israel to renege on his deal with heterodox rabbis to create a space at the Kotel for egalitarian prayer. Although he is still allowing construction towards that end to continue (according to one report I saw) he has asked that a new deal be reached that will satisfy the objections Charedim have had to this one.

The response by heterodox rabbis and their constituents has been predictable. ‘Netanyahu has sold out!’ ‘He cares more about his coalition than he does about the support form the majority of Jews the majority of which are made up of heterodox Jews.’ He is only interest is retaining power – consequences be damned!’

Every editorial I’ve seen has attacked him along the above lines. One headline I saw in a supposedly respected Jewish newspaper used ‘street language’ do describe Netanyahu’s actions toward liberal Jews.

Reform activist Anat Hoffman who heads the Women of the Wall is livid that she and her group can’t pray they way they choose to pray!

What about that? Why can’t we just let them do whatever they want? Live and let live! For me the answer has always been quite clear. We have a tradition that has had the backing of generations of devout Jewish souls that have come to the Kotel to pray. Why have we not heard the women of the past making this plaintive cry? Why wasn’t my mother or grandmother cursing out men for their lack of respecting their feminine aspirations?

Was there ever a single devout Jewish woman since the Temple era that has ever been recorded complaining about her role in Judaism? I tend to doubt it. Throughout Jewish history devout Jewish men and women accepted who and what they were. Lovingly devoting themselves in service to God in the role their parents transmitted to them. Prior to the enlightenment, I don’t think Jewish women thought of themselves as dominated by a paternalistic Jewish hierarchy. This is a modern invention.

Some will say that the Jewish women of the past were ignorant. That the enlightenment has given them insight. It has awakened mankind up to inequities between men and women. This may have been the way women were treated in general society. Jewish women were a part of it to a certain extent - albeit far less than they are today

But Judaism has been consistent in how it sees the roles of men and the roles of women. Both sexes have shared obligations to God. But each has their own as well. If there were women in Judaism that were treated badly it was not because of the roles God mandated for us. It was a reflection of the times in which they lived. But Halacha hasn’t changed. What it is now – it was then.

I therefore reject the hue and cry about the Kotel by all these liberal Jews. They clearly do not represent the Judaism of their forebears. They represent their own versions of it which have been taught and promoted by their liberal Jewish leaders.

All the clamor about the Kotel comes from people who care little about the traditions of the past. Enlightenment has taught them that they should be free to serve God in any way they choose. Tradition be damned. If Israel doesn’t give in to their demands…. ‘Goodbye!’

Now I realize that the ‘complainers’ are not evil people. I also realize that many of them are very sincere about serving God in their own way. Whether it be in the way the at Women at the Wall or through an egalitarian service… or simply by being active in worthy social causes like Civil Rights; or Gay Rights; or protecting the environment.

At the same time I see what their clamor is for now and compare them to their forbears. I look at the devout of the past and the devout of now and ask which ones do I believe to be best fulfilling the word of God? I have to believe that our devout forefathers and mothers who did not have a personal desire to buck tradition are the ones more accurately fulfilling God’s will

Now I know that this approach will not win any accolades among my liberal friends (to say the least). But I believe that my traditionalist views can be found in the more pure and pristine culture of Sephardim. Which has not been diluted by denominational breakaways. They do not look outside of their traditional rabbinic leaders for guidance. Even among those that are not all that observant - they respect them for the authorities they are.

Judaism does not look at the past and say we know better. We look at the past and say our devout ancestors did. Tradition! That is how we have been able to survive all of these centuries in hostile environments. And that’s how we will survive in the future.

Charedi women - at greater risk of death from breast cancer

Chasid Shoteh (idiot Chasid) is a term used by the Gemarah to describe an act of piety that in reality is counter to Halacha. Chasid, as used in the Gemarah does not mean what it does today. It simply means an individual of great piety. The founder of modern era Chasidus co-opted that word as the name for his new movement, Chasidism. A Jew that belonged to it was called a Chasid. He considered the Jews that followed him and his stingencies to be the most pious among us.

A Chasid Shoteh does not refer to the Chasid of today. It refers to any Jew whose piety is so extreme that it even prevents him from performing a life saving act. The Gemarah gives an example of that. If a man sees a naked woman drowning and refrains from saving her because of his concern for modesty, he is called a Chasid Shoteh.

What Shoshanna Keats Jaskoll describes in her JC article as the behavior of Bnei Brak’s rabbinic establishment can only be described that way. They are actually advocating that the prevention of potentially fatal illnesses for women not be addressed publicly because of modesty considerations.

Here is what she said in her JC article:

"There’s no greater value for a Charedi woman than modesty.” So said the former chief of staff for the Chief Rabbinate of Israel, Rabbi Dov Halbertal. He was explaining why posters raising awareness of breast cancer screening in Charedi society were inappropriate for the very population they were crafted to reach. No matter how carefully posters talking about women’s health are worded, he explained, the fact that they address women at all makes them inherently immodest.

I can’t think of too many things that more closely resemble the Gemarah’s description of a Chasid Shoteh than this. They are putting modesty issues before life saving issues, just like that Chasid Shoteh in the Gemarah.

In the case of Bnei Brak, to say that addressing women at all is inherently immodest is the height of foolishness and irresponsibility! If it wasn’t such a serious issue I’d be laughing my head off at a statement like that!

Charedi women are not immune to breast cancer. Breast cancer affects them too. They can die from it, just like any woman can as Mrs Keats Jaskoll notes:

Three major Israeli medical studies in the past decade have revealed that, despite the fact that Charedi women develop breast cancer at a lower rate than the general population, they suffer a 30 per cent higher mortality rate from the disease.

That breast cancer can be life threatening is unarguable. But measures can be taken to prevent the disease from killing you. Especially if there is early detection. That’s why mammograms are so important.

There has been some controversy about false positives that occasionally occur raising questions among medical experts about what age screenings should begin. For example the American Cancer Society has recommended that the age where annual testing begins should be raised from age 40 to 45. On the other hand 'the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG), say that starting at 40 is best. Meanwhile, the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force Services (USPSTF) says that women can wait until 50'.

There is no disagreement, however, about the need to be begin being screened at some point and to do it annually from there. That rabbis in places like Bnei Brak forbid any public discussion of it for modesty reasons may be one reason there is a higher mortality rate in the Charedi world despite their lower tendency to get the disease.

I have to wonder about the thinking that goes behind the kind of extreme modesty guidelines that can actually increase the incidence of death. Surely the rabbinic leaders of Bnei Brak know about the concept of Chasid Shoteh. How do they not see their attitude here being an application of this very clear Gemarah?

I know they must think there are other ways to transmit this message to their wives, mothers, and daughters. But there is no better way to get the word out than by publicizing it publicly. Shouldn’t getting the message out to as many people as possible be the priority here?

That is after all how they get their other messages out. There is no reluctance to publicize those issues with public notices on billboards and the like. They are quick to call for an call an Asifa (public gathering) with speaker after speaker haranguing their public about an issue like the internet. Isn’t the prevention of death from breast cancer as important an issue as the internet?

Are they willing to allow a higher morbidity rate for Charedi women with breast cancer so that they can maintain their extreme modesty standards? It sure seems like it.

They sure look Frum!

It’s worse than I could have ever imagined. I honestly don’t know how to react. I am dumbfounded. It appears that religious Jews that defraud government assistance programs designed for the needy is at an epidemic level. If there is any saving grace about this, it is the following. There are over a hundred thousand residents in Lakewood. Hundreds out of over a hundred thousand is a very small percentage of the whole. Which means that the vast majority there either do not take welfare payments of any kind – or take them legitimately.

But still, according to Asbury Park Press:

In the last two days, hundreds of residents called township leaders asking how they can avoid arrest or get amnesty related to an alleged public-assistance fraud scheme that could stretch into the millions of dollars, according to one law enforcement with knowledge of the ongoing probes.

Hundreds! Is this what the ‘Lakewood - Ir HaTorah’ stands for? Ripping off the government? To say that I am embarrassed that so many openly religious Jews have been doing this would be an understatement. To say that the Chilul HaShem is massive is an understatement as well. One thing is certain. Defrauding the government has nothing to do with the Torah. Neither, it seems do these hundreds of supposedly religious residents of Lakewood, despite their being residents of a town whose nickname is ‘the city of Torah’!

This raises the question again… the same question it always does when Jews get caught violating the Torah’s clear prohibition from stealing: Why? What is it about these supposedly religious Jews that makes them think it’s OK to do that as long as you don’t get caught? And what makes them think they won’t be caught – in light of all those that were caught in the past? Do they think they were smarter than their predecessors? Did they think they would not repeat the same mistakes and therefore get away with it? (Fact is I don’t even care about that. I care more about the first question. The second question only speaks to their arrogance and stupidity!)

One might be able to get some insight into what motivates these criminals by what one of their lay leaders was quoted saying:

Duvi Honig, the CEO of the Lakewood-based Orthodox Jewish Chamber of Commerce, said that thousands of Jewish families in the town need the public assistance to get by and that some people are tempted to take more than they need.

"The pressure of the community overhead – especially the (cost of) private schooling – is unsustainable," he said about the Jewish community. "People are forced to find ways to bend the system."

How sad it is that a community leader would make such a statement as an excuse. But that is apparently how it is.

And yet, I do not think this point can be emphasized enough. The Charedi world (of which Lakewood is clearly a part) is encouraged to have large families. The cost of educating each child is exorbitant. Most families – even those with decent incomes simply don’t have the money to pay for their children’s education. Even in the Charedi world where tuition costs are generally lower than average.

Furthermore lower tuition costs are often achieved the expense of sacrificing the quality of their secular studies programs - or eliminating them altogether! (Which exacerbates the problem by producing a new generation of religious Jews that will be even less capable of earning a decent income. All while being encouraged to have large families too. (A catch-22 if I ever heard one.) That culture needs to be changed if this problem has any chance of being solved.

But need is never a motivation for ethical people to do unethical things. And certainly not to violate Halacha. Ethical people don’t steal from the government even if they are desperate. Religious Jews pride themselves on being the most ethical people among us. People that sacrifice their own physical well being rather than compromise their values. The only possible explanation of this is they do not consider stealing from the government unethical or against Halacha. They must consider funding their children’s education that way quite ethical.

How do Jews that have had an intensive Jewish education arrive at such an obvious flaw in their thinking? I have some theories about that which I have shared in the past that might explain it - but do not justify it. They are, however, beyond the scope of this post.

Why have all of these hundreds Lakewood of residents come forward now? Because of yet another major Chilul HaShem. Among those arrested are members of a family with a very high profile name. They have been caught with their greedy hands in the public till. When I read the name Sorotzkin, my heart sank.

That name is legendary in the Torah world. Rav Laizer and Rav Baruch Sorotzkin were two of the Roshei Yeshiva in Telshe when I was a student there in the early 60s. These were huge Talmidei Chachamim of impeccable character.

R’ Baruchs son, R’ Yitzchok was my ‘Eltera (older) Chavrusa’. He is the brilliant son of R’ Baruch that the Yeshiva assigned to me when he was in their Beis HaMedrash and I was in high school. (Telshe had a program where every high school student was assigned a Beis HaMedrash student to study with them at night. R’ Yitzchok was my Chavrusa during my second year there.) The one thing I remember most about him besides his brilliance and Hasmada (diligence in Torah study) was his sense of ethics.

And now relatives of this illustrious family have been caught defrauding the government. From Brick Patch:

Federal and local authorities (released) details on the arrests of four couples, including a prominent rabbi, in Lakewood Monday morning on charges of failing to report "sizable incomes" so they could allegedly fraudulently collect more than $1.3 million in public assistance benefits…

The arrests are the first in what are expected to be multiple ongoing arrests in Lakewood, the Ocean County prosecutor's office said. Additional charges, including tax charges, are possible as well, the prosecutor's office said.

It’s one thing to catch a Jewish thief who happens to be religious. Every society since the beginning of time has people like that. Still a Chilul HaShem, though. It is, however, a lot worse when prominent names in the Torah world are caught doing it. And worse yet is the discovery of hundreds of Jews now coming out of the woodwork basically admitting to the same thing and asking ‘how they can avoid arrest or get amnesty related to an alleged public-assistance fraud scheme’.

At this point I want to be absolutely clear. Unethical behavior is not the sole domain of the Charedi world. This has been made painfully clear in a recent voter fraud plea deal involving the son of a prominent modern Orthodox leader (who is unfortunately not well). I can’t believe I’m saying this. But it appears therefore that unethical behavior is endemic to the entire Torah world!

When will we see an end to this kind of thing? This has to stop! The Torah world needs to turn its full attention to this problem. Roshei Yeshiva (from Lakewood to YU), Chasidic leaders, (from Satmar to Lubavitch) Agudah, Young Israel, the OU, the RCA… all of them need to speak out publicly about this and condemn it in the strongest possible terms. Without any qualifiers! It wouldn’t even be a bad idea to call an Asifa - a public gathering consisting of the entire range of Orthodox Jews - with all of these institutions participating - to hammer honesty and ethical conduct into the Orthodox public mindset.

More importantly our educational systems – all of them – must be required to teach ethical behavior to all of our students and consistently impress upon them forbidden nature of stealing from the government. Students must learn that not only is violating Shabbos against the Torah - so too is stealing from the government. That needs to be imprinted onto the brain of every single student.

Let the idea of being Chareid L’Dvar HaShem include not only being strict about Chalav Yisroel and Yashan. But being equally strict about ethical behavior as well. Laxity about that can only result in a Chilul HaShem. Until that is done. We will no doubt be down this road again – who knows how many more times!

Everybody’s got an opinion. Yours truly included. I will get to mine in a moment. In a surprising reversal of a compromise agreement reached between the Israeli Keneset and heterodox rabbis, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu bowed to pressure from the Charedi parties that constitute part of his governing coalition and reneged on the deal. Nothing new here. I have already discussed this issue.

The vast majority of non Orthodox Jewish organizational leadership are bitterly disappointed with the Prime Minister and have made that disappointment known to him in very strong terms. Including reluctant protests from some non Orthodox Jewish congressmen. There has even been an urgent request to expeditiously resolve this issue by Malcolm Hoenlein, an Orthodox Jew who is the executive vice president of the Conference of Presidents of Major American Jewish Organizations.

There have also been some not so subtle threats by some heterodox rabbis to withdraw their support of the Jewish State. If, they reason, the state will not accommodate the wishes of the vast majority of Jews in the world, and only cater the ultra Orthodox, why should they support that?

I hear that argument. But I don’t believe it. Because supporting the State of Israel has been just about the only thing exclusively Jewish that most of these movements urge their members to do. That they strongly urge their members to support various worthy social causes is laudable. But supporting things like civil rights is hardly an exclusively Jewish enterprise. Israel is really the only thing exclusively Jewish in that regard. Jewish Federations in America (that are made up mostly of people that belong to heterodox movements) allocate the lion’s share of their budget to Israel or related causes. I do not see that changing despite any implied threat to do so.

The push for an egalitarian space at the Kotel is a relatively new undertaking. 50 years have passed since God allowed us to retake possession of it… and only now do they clamor for it.

Where were they til now? I’ll tell you.

When they went to the Kotel, they did so the same way everyone else did. The same way the Pope, and Presidents did. They went to the men’s side of the Kotel and stuck a piece of paper into the wall with a message to God. (As though God would only read it if it stuck in the Kotel! But that is another subject.)

No secular Jew that I am aware of ever complained that he couldn’t approach the wall without women being there. Few if any non observant Jews ever demanded that they have an egalitarian prayer service at the Kotel. There were some heterodox leaders a few years ago that asked for such a space and Israel gave it to them without any controversy. It is located at another section of the Kotel called Robinson’s Arch. It is still there. But it is hardly used. If I am not mistaken it is this space that is being expanded for eventual larger and more accessible use. This is still going on at Netayahu’s request despite his reneging on the deal.

Let us not make any mistake about it. The push for an egalitarian space at the Kotel is really just a proxy vehicle to gain state approved legitimacy equal to that of Orthodoxy. By asking that there be a a common entrance to both plazas so that people can choose which one to go to, the message becomes that Reform, Conservative and Orthodox are all legitimate versions of Judaism. Take your pick. You don’t want to be observant? Fine. You can be Reform. God is perfectly OK with that. That will be how it will be seen by most Jews of limited backgrounds.

If you are Orthodox that it is anathema. It is promoting a lie. Even though most of us even in Orthodoxy fall short of full observance in a variety of ways, we nevertheless realize that we are falling short. We do not say its OK to not be observant. We instead admit it when we fail and ask for forgiveness. Which is what Yom Kippur is for.

Why are they doing this now? I don’t think you have to be a genius to know the answer to that. They are simply trying to survive. And Israel is their last best hope. I don’t blame them for trying. I just strongly disagree with what they are trying to do at the Kotel in furtherance of that goal. Although I’m sure they think they are sincere in demanding pluralism.

For those on the outside looking in, it is not surprising that they see Orthodoxy trying to shove itself down the throats of a world desirous of pluralism. That is after all a worthy ideal in a vacuum. But if one is Orthodox and sees heterodox movements as a distortion of Judaism, it should come as no surprise that we oppose including movements that do that. We are fighting for an ideal. Just like heterodoxy is. It is unfair to criticize Orthodox opposition to a pluralism that legitimizes what we believe are distortions to Judaism. We are fighting for our ideals. Just like heterodoxy is fighting for theirs. I am surprised that there is so little understanding of this.

Orthodoxy is not prejudiced against any Jew. We do not wish to deny any Jew, whether Orthodox, Reform, or Conservative entry to the Kotel to pray - or not pray - as they wish. All Jews are brothers. We are all descendants of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Our ancestors were all at Sinai. The Kotel is the one place where all Jews are equal. No one asks what denomination you belong to before approaching the Kotel. That is the way it has been and that is the way it should be. The Kotel should not be the place to fight our ideological battles.

That said, it may be surprising to some that I too think that the Prime Minister should find a way to compromise so that we can end the divisiveness. I for one do not believe that any of the heterodox rabbis are evil. I think they are just as idealistic and sincere as Orthodox rabbis. They believe they are fighting for a just cause just as we believe we are.

It does no one any good to alienate them. In a sense, their movements are about Kiruv too. We should recognize that and respect that goal if not the way they actualize it. The vast majority of the Jewish people are not observant. Many of them are abandoning any connection they have to Judaism. Some of whom are in danger of extinguishing their Jewish line by marrying out! In their own way heterodox rabbis are trying to reverse that trend. We should be doing the same. Alienating their leaders is not the way to do that. A compromise that will give each of us a bit of what we want is the best way to do that. I hope it happens.

Image from YWN

How sad it is when a Charedi internet news media outlet turns a humongous Chilul HaShem into a case of antisemitism. This is exactly what YWN (Yeshiva World News) has done in an oped published late yesterday. The disclaimer about not condoning fraud notwithstanding. Saying they don't condone it is a thinly disguised cover for making that charge.

The recent astonishing arrests for welfare fraud of family members of one of the most prominent names in the Torah world are the subject of the oped. YWN questions why there has been so much media attention and outrage about 12 Jews arrested in Lakewood when there has been little coverage and no outrage of similar crimes by 68 non Jews in Pennsylvania. Their conclusion is as follows:

Want to know why? Take a look at the list of names and you will see the reason: NO ORTHODOX JEWS WITH BEARDS. It’s not a “story” if a bunch of meth-heads are arrested for fraud. But if a Jew with a beard and Yarmulka is arrested for the same exact crime, it becomes a “prominent Rabbi” story splashed on national headlines…

L)et’s be blunt. This is blatant open anti-Semitism by the fake-news / drive-by media. It is simply appalling and utterly despicable. There will be those who will say that this hatred against Jews was brought upon ourselves by past crimes by Orthodox Jews over the years. That may or may not be true. But this hatred towards the Lakewood Orthodox Jewish community can’t be ignored any longer.

It is opeds like this that are part of the problem. YWN completely practically ignores the very letter it partially quotes (published earlier) :

Yes, we all saw the letter on YWN yesterday calling us the “Am Hanivchar” and telling us that we are held to a higher standard.

That should be their focus. That should be the reason we are upset. Not just the media, but every single Jew that cares about a Chilul HaShem.

I do not hate Orthodox Jews with beards. Many of my close family members are Orthodox and have beards. I do not hate the ‘Lakewood Orthodox Jewish community’. Lakewood is a tremendous Makom Torah. There is a legitimate reason its nickname is ‘Ir HaTorah’. That’s because more Torah study takes place there per capita than any other city in America. What ever problems I or anyone else might have with some of the things that go on there, or their Hashkafos - there can be absolutely no dispute about the amount and the quality of pure Torah study for its own sake that takes place there. That is to be admired.

But I am going to condemn in the strongest possible terms when any of these people - people that are supposed to exemplify the highest ideals of the Torah - end up doing the opposite… showing they have the same standard of ethics that the above mentioned meth-heads do.

I realize that they said they don’t condone it. I’m sure they don’t. That would be ridiculous for them to say – even if they were lying about it and did condone it. But to say this is all about antisemitism is as ridiculous as saying that Jews for Jesus is all about Kiruv.

True, crime is crime. But when common criminals do it, it is not news. When the supposedly most upstanding citizens of the Am HaNivchar (God’s chosen people) commit a crime – it is major news. For a common crime to be considered a major news story - it means that honesty is the expected norm . That this story is major news is not antisemitism.

The editorial staff at YWN should realize that instead of having the typical knee-jerk reaction of the Jewish religious right that yells ‘antisemitism’ at the drop of a black hat. ‘Relilgious Jews are reported getting caught in a fraud?’ ‘Antisemtism!’

No it isn’t. That they think it is might just explain why some Jews think fraud against anyone that isn’t Jewish or Orthodox - is OK. If non Jewish or non Orthodox society hates us so much, then stealing from them and getting away with it might even be a Mitzvah!

YWN should be screaming at the top of their lungs about the massive Chilul HaShem that has been caused here – and fully condemning it. Without any qualifiers or finger-pointing. The only bias here is theirs. I am ashamed and disappointed by their reaction. Because accusatory statements like that might too be a Chilul HaShem. Which makes them part of the problem. Their disclaimer notwithstanding.

How many more times must we witness a scene like this? (source of image)

The system is unsustainable. This is not the first time I’ve made this statement. Unfortunately it probably won’t be the last. The context in which I usually make it is the Charedi world in Israel. I still believe it is more applicable there than here. But it should also be clear from recent events in Lakewood that it is unsustainable here too. It isn’t just me saying it – or those with an anti Charedi agenda. Their own community leaders are implying it – if not outright saying it. After clearly condemning the fraud, they described the economic climate in which the residents of Lakewood live. From Asbury Park Press:

"It's absolute panic," said Rabbi Moshe Weisberg, a member of Lakewood's Vaad, or Jewish council, about the mood in the town after this week's arrests. "People are begging us for guidance.""The average family feels it an absolute necessity to send their children to private schools," Weisberg said, adding that large families are also a part of Jewish culture. "They really want to build a large family with lots of happy children.

"Financial considerations come second," he said. To make ends meet, many of these families rely on public assistance, Weisberg said. Duvi Honig, CEO of the Lakewood-based Orthodox Jewish Chamber of Commerce, said for many Jewish families, collecting public assistance is almost an inevitability. "People have such overhead that they don't have a choice," Honig said.

If this doesn’t describe an unsustainable system, I don’t know what does.

Just to be clear, I absolutely support the concept of full time Torah study for the elite among us. We need Torah scholars and Poskim as much as we need doctors and lawyers; carpenters and plumbers. Lakewood is the kind of Yeshiva that gives us these valuable Jewish resources. It is Torah scholars like those that should be supported by the Jewish public so that a they would never have to resort to welfare checks. I would add that the character of the kind of Torah scholar I am talking about would never cheat the government and they would be as abhorred by what has happened as I am!

The problem is the culture that is based on the unsustainable paradigm that includes: 1) encouraging all male students to spend as much time as possible in full time Torah study; 2) encouraging women to seek marriage partners like that; and 3) encouraging them to have as many children as possible. That last one is topped off with an admonishment that the inability to afford a large family is not a reason to refrain from the procreative Mitzvah.

Add to that the cost of a Jewish education for each of those children, is their any real question why so much of Lakewood must resort to the welfare system? As Duvi Honig put it: "People have such overhead that they don't have a choice! The pressure to hide income so that can get the some financial relief from government welfare programs - that were seen as easy to take advantage of (til now) must be enormous!

The idea of everyone being put into this position because of a modern day Charedi educational paradigm is what’s wrong with the system. You can’t keep educating your people to choose a lifestyle like that first and to look at finances last. The common attitude of Zorg Nisht. Di Eibishter vet helfen - Don’t worry. God will provide – is simply bad advice. Sure, ideals come before money. But without money the ideals will very likely not materialize.The Mishna in Avos warned us centuries ago, Ein Kemach Ein Torah – without sustenance, there can be no Torah. This has been all but ignored by the current Charedi educational paradigm.

Does this mean that young married coupled should give up any idea of studying in Kollel at all? That only he elite among us should consider it? No. For those who want to do it , it can be a very valuable experience to spend a year or two after marriage studying Torah full time. But at the same time every single student ought to be taught that famous line from Avos: Ein Kemach EinTorah.

Along with that phrase should be an educational paradigm that will give young people the tools to make a decent living. Furthermore (and perhaps more importantly) unless they are among the few elite, they should be deliberately encouraged to leave that Kollel after a year or two and start providing for their family.

And dare I say it? The idea of having as many children as possible without considering the affordability of it should not be automatic. There are many opinions about how to fulfill the Mitzvah of procreation. Not all of them involve having as many children as possible.

But in the Charedi world, that is encouraged unless there are physical or mental health issues involving the parents that would prevent it. Financial consideration are never a ‘permit’ to refrain from having as many children as possible.

Maybe what has happened in Lakewood – which in large part is due to the pressure of having and supporting a large family – is a turning point. Maybe the financial argument should be seen as a mental issue too. And family size should be guided as much by the stress of trying to figure out how to pay for a Kollel lifestyle as it is guided by a straight forward physical or mental health issue.

If things don’t change along these lines, I’m afraid the the temptation to defraud the government will remain as strong as ever. Which means the Chilul HaShem will be what is sustained as much as the lifestyle that has caused it.

Baruch Dayan HaEmes. There will be no new post today due to the sudden passing of my mother in law, Mrs. Cyrla Sauerhaft at age 100.

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